Armageddon And So Forth

Those were the words of Ronald Reagan, delivered casually and undoubtedly with a little dementia thrown in, when he was speaking in his inimitable style about the sort of nuclear annihilation his administration, at least initially, seemed determined to court.  For whatever reason, Republicans have, over the last thirty years or so (and longer if you count McCarthy et al…), relied almost exclusively on endlessly repeated threats of Armageddon if their myriad faith-based prescriptions aren’t immediately adopted, despite their inherent unpopularity.  Everyone from Saddam Hussein and Osama Bin Laden to eco-terrorists and the Dixie Chicks were reflexively and effortlessly made, despite all evidence to the contrary, into traitorous, omnipotent powers that meant to not just sap America of its exceptionalism, which in Washingtonese means, you guessed it, military budgets, but literally to wipe us off the map, somehow.  Alert readers will recall that time generally proves their fears overrated, often pretty spectacularly.

Those were the days, huh?   Wasn’t it great when Bush’s overconfident and doomed quest to privatize Social Security summarily collapsed as his wars already had, and, along with his revolting and pathetic response to Hurricane Katrina, his incompetence and stupidity basically handed the House to the Democrats in 2006, and later the Presidency along with it?   You could be forgiven for thinking that such a massive electoral repudiation of a party and its bonkers, demonstrably failed ideas would lead to something, well, different.  That is, if you lived in a different country, or had amnesia.  Times have changed.   You see, a lot of Very Serious People in Washington have decided that actual people voting, expressing opinions, and all that is an woefully outdated way of running the country, and have thus chosen a course that nobody really wants, but yet seems to be our destiny.  Disenfranchisement is the new, if you’ll pardon the pun, black.  And young.  And poor.  And elderly.   Quelle surprise.

A vocal, if not physically very attractive or numerous, bunch of people who ardently hold a lot of slickly marketed but nonetheless certifiably retarded ideas are now responsible for a lot of halfwits and cuckoo people currently holding elected offices in America, thanks to the same Supreme Court that put 2000 loser George W. Bush in office.  It’s nice work if you can get it, really; have your dad put some toadies on the court, get in there, and put a couple of even worse toadies in there, and, Wa La….  You get Citizens (!) United, and after that, voting Democratic, unless it’s for, say, Blanche Lincoln, becomes either illegal or irrelevant (or both).  If you listen to the Liberal (!) Media, you’ll endlessly hear that “both sides are equally at fault,” but does anyone who doesn’t wear a bib to dinner still believe such utter horseshit?

If Commies and Muslims really are getting ready to take over, and the whole future of the country really does depend on throwing some more virgins into the confidence fairies’ volcano, there’s a chance we could be doing the right thing here.  Vanishingly slight, but still there.  More likely, the Republican-sodden media and a tiny and purposefully ill-informed minority will win the day, just like in every economic battle over the last thirty years, and Overton’s window will have moved so far to the right that Pat Buchanan will have a seemingly permanent spot on MSNBC.  Oops.  Never mind.

No deficit “Grand Bargain,” (would such a thing be even necessary or desirable at the moment) that wouldn’t make things immeasurably worse is even “on the table,” in one of Washington’s more contemptible phrases.  There’ll be sacrifice, all right, but don’t count on it being “shared.”  And don’t count on it being the last, either.

PS….  Happy Birthday to my stinky brother, Turd, who will be the same age as me until next week.




  1. Annice says:

    Happy Birthday Turd!!!

  2. mikeinportc says:

    Happy Birthday Turd :)

  3. dirigo says:

    Turd? That’s not very endearing, dearie! Whatever. Happy B-day, Turdster.

    Anyway, as Sarah Palin said in a slight different context, about another time, long, long ago: “Keep ringin’ them bells!!!”

  4. Happy Birthday Turd. BTW, what term of endearment do you use for your brother?

    Just curious.

  5. The Heel says:

    Happy Birthday, Turd. Hope all is well.

    • cocktailhag says:

      I think it would have been funnier to say, “I hope you tipped over.”

      • Annice says:

        I agree Hag! Although we are the pro’s of tipping over! LOL!

      • The Heel says:

        He is now in an age range where tipping takes two to three days out of his life. I wouldn’t wish that to anyone, not even Eric Cantor or John Boehner.

        Hmmm, coming to think of it, I guess I wish those two will tip over on many levels…