Posts Tagged ‘Rick Santorum’

Farewell, Li’l Ricky

Faced with the strong possibility of losing (again) in his home state, Rick Santorum has done the brave, or rather, cowardly thing and dropped out of the race, thereby preserving his all-important wingnut welfare career.  While this comes as no great surprise for those of us who knew he never had a chance, by which [...]

Think of the Children

I think I just figured out why Rick Santorum is so obsessed with nudity in other, more attractive people; whenever he tries it, he invariably looks like chopped liver.  Actually, chopped liver is way too kind; he more closely resembles a half-melted pate’ sculpture of Jabba the Hut.   Given his undoubtedly teeny and uncooperative [...]

Kneepad Countdown

When questioned about Rush Limbaugh calling Sandra Fluke a “slut” and a “prostitute,” repeatedly, lil’ Ricky temporarily put his big boy pants on and said the following: “He’s being absurd, but that’s you know, an entertainer can be absurd,” Santorum told CNN’s Wolf Blitzer on “The Situation Room.” “He’s in a very different business than [...]

That’s the Ticket

Since the fault for the 2008 financial collapse lies so plainly with their own policies, including but not limited to bank deregulation and ever-lower middle class wages, Republicans have been furiously casting about for an alternative theory ever since it occurred.  Generally, they settled on the Community Reinvestment Act, a Carter-era anti-redlining law, and shiftless [...]

Getting By On their Looks

It’s no secret that Republicans tailor their appeals to what could politely be called slower Americans, but things are getting a little ridiculous here lately.  First lil’ Ricky Santorum says President Obama is a “snob” for wanting more Americans to attend college, then, when questioned about such an absurd comment, he doubled down, whining that [...]

Want a Ride (on top of my) Cadillac(s)?

I make more money than….  Calvin Coolidge.  Put together. Lina Lamont in Singin’ in the Rain Back in the quaint days of 2008, it was a bit of a scandal when John McCain couldn’t remember how many houses he had.   Four years later, Mitt Romney is attempting to “connect” with Michigan voters by telling them [...]

Ass Wednesday

UPDATED BELOW: Several years ago, when altar boy gone bad Rick Santorum was still busily embarrassing Pennsylvanians in the US Senate, I found myself watching CNN with my dear friend Tina and her mother, and one of them said, “What’s that on his forehead?”  I sheepishly glanced at the TV, being the only Catholic in [...]

The Money Changers

As infuriated and embarrassed as I am at how the 2012 elections are quite rapidly devolving into a warped and unsettling religious revival, bent on banishing from the earth not just the Kenyan Socialist, but the majority of Americans who supported him, I’m considerably more chagrined at the pretense in the media that nothing has [...]

Eating Worms

Nobody likes me; everybody hates me. I think I’ll go out and eat some worms. That little childhood ditty rings in my ears as I read about how Republicans are fighting the apocalyptic battle they have set up this fall’s elections to be; through whining, cheating, and dirty tricks, and doing other disgusting things that [...]

Splattering Santorum

Now, I know Santorum’s people are just as big of religious nuts as Rick himself, but can they really be that sheltered, too?  Have they ever used the google?  Or, is frothy brown stuff something you want to put in your ad intentionally?  You, know, to get it all out in the open right away. [...]