Making Sarah Palin Look Smart
Thus spake the frothy mixture:
SANTORUM: My big argument with Paul Ryan is that he doesn’t apply a lot of these programs to the current generation of seniors, or those who are at or near retirement. And I think that presupposes that a lot of those current seniors don’t want to participate in the economic solvency of our country. Don’t want to participate in saving our country. I think that’s wrong. I think most seniors –- certainly those that can afford to –- are more than willing to do their fair share to solve their problem.
Well, there’s an awful lot of crazy, a truckload of delusional, and a pile of stupid you could see from outer space in that remarkable statement, but consider the source. When a guy who brought home his wife’s stillborn fetus for his numerous homely children to play with and lost his last seat by almost twenty points is still invited on television to declare his presidential candidacy, could the bar be any lower? Why wouldn’t he say something so jaw-droppingly asinine?
First of all, the very existence of crazy, parafascist politicians like Santorum is largely owed to the fact that Fox News (and hate radio) are all the rage amongst the adult diapers set, all of whom rely on Medicare, so to merely say that such a statement is politically stupid is like saying Chris Christie ought to diet. Who, pray, is going to vote for a creepy, anti-gay religious nut and failed politician with perhaps the worst Google Problem on the face of the earth? Trust me, it won’t be the Ipod generation. Smooth move, Man on Dog.
Then, Santorum, who clearly doesn’t get out much, advances the laughable notion that seniors are just itching to pay more for their health care, “especially” the ones who can afford to, because, well, surely the read Ayn Rand, too. This is retarded on so many levels I’m beginning to wonder how Santorum can dress himself, but I’ll take a stab at it. First of all, that there are a bunch of geezers out there sitting on a pile of money that they want to give out… if you’re old and still can afford to pay for bypasses and whatnot out of pocket, chances are you’re not the generous type. In fact, you’re probably more like Santorum’s backers, who feel that, once you’ve got a certain amount of money, the whole world owes you and your heirs a luxurious, perpetual idleness. Good luck asking rich old people to pay for something they’re currently getting for free. These people don’t go to early bird specials because the light’s better.
Next, you’ll notice that those much more numerous old people who might not be able to afford “their problem” are not just dismissed, they’re irrelevant; this isn’t about them, after all. It’s about an idea. Ideas are important to a guy like Rick, and he’s hedged his bets by producing a small army of lil’ fascists, a couple of whom might escape the mental health system and be able to support him in his old age, but better yet, his nutty ideas make a lot of Real Americans, i.e. those with trust funds, extra happy. This time-honored tactic generally pays off. When Jesus’ blessed poor come up against, say, the Walmart heirs, you know who’s going get reamed in a Santorum-smeared world.
As though he hadn’t made a big enough ass of himself for one news cycle, Santorum also today dropped his day-old campaign slogan, Make America America Again, when he found out to his predictable surprise that it was (no doubt inadvertently) the title of a famous (to the literate) Langston Hughes poem. Among Hughes’ many faults, he happened to be a darky and a homo, put together, and the poem itself was about relieving the misery of the downtrodden, through unions. A bigger Republican FAIL would be hard to imagine, except when you consider the competition, of course.
The Manchester Union Leader, that infamous right wing New Hampshire paper, caught the Langston Hughes story, and the first commenter put it best when he said that no matter Santorum’s policies, he was utterly unelectable because the incident showed he was “dumber than a bag of hammers.”
That’s putting it mildly. I’ve half a mind to send him five bucks.